“SHOE LACES FOR U” EU EDICT 20.496 ENGLISH FOR THE USE OF. 24.2.12
Legislation: OFFICIAL EU
DEFINITION There are three basic types of EU legislation: regulations, directives and decisions.
A regulation is similar to a national law with the difference that it is applicable in all EU countries.
Directivesset out general rules to be transferred into national law by each country as
they deem appropriate.
A decision only deals with a particular issue and specifically mentioned persons or organisations.
What follows is, of course, pure fantasy BT IS IT?
The corridors of the EU buildings in Brussels and Strasbourg
are buzzing with the sound of secretaries pushing trolleys loaded with large boxes containing a secret
draft of an even more secret draft of an edict specifically aimed at those English trouble makers across the French
channel.
The drafts are being distributed to committees to be
read, absorbed, debated and amended then distributed to committees of a higher
authority. The subject of this 2000 page document is the humble shoe lace. For
far too long, in the view of the EU, shoe laces have had it all their own way
and created a confused and chaotic mess.
The EU, in its munificence, has now decided to end the turmoil and regularize the many
disparate variations on this theme. All members of the EU will, from an
undisclosed date, conform to certain rules regarding the design, manufacture,
distribution and wearing of shoe laces as prescribed in this document.
Shoe laces will, henceforth be of a determined length, shape, colour and durability as laid down in
this gobble de gook issued from the We Who Know Best dept. of the EU. More importantly shoe laces will
be political correct, bi sexual and not subject to race, creed or country of origin.
Shoe lace manufacturers wishing to deviate from the standard description
above may, without let or hindrance, submit a request to change, alter, invent, design, or in some strange manner stray from the rules as laid down by the Dept. That Knows Best. Forms for this request may be obtained by forwarding a hand written piece of lined note paper from any local EU We Know Best office on your high street. Tick boxes as
appropriate eg. Ethnic height, size of shoe left and right. Make four copies and send with a cheque for 100 Euros payable to the EU sports club to be received not later than 2094.
Governments, county and borough councils will be sent copies of this judgment in due course for distribution to the public along with several pages of tiny print which all are advised to read. Failure to do so may render recipients liable to a substantial fine or imprisonment where they will not be allowed shoelaces in case they try to hang themselves.
Don Read © don-read@tiscali.co.uk
www.youtube.com/donread
THE HYPOCRISY OF BUREAUCRACY
The EU spends £150m of tax payers
money a year on monthly migrating the assembly and all its trappings between
France and Belgium. Proposals for a fixed HQ
have been opposed by France. Imagine a monthly move of
Parliament from Londonto Doncaster and back.
Legislation: OFFICIAL EU
DEFINITION There are three basic types of EU legislation: regulations, directives and decisions.
A regulation is similar to a national law with the difference that it is applicable in all EU countries.
Directivesset out general rules to be transferred into national law by each country as
they deem appropriate.
A decision only deals with a particular issue and specifically mentioned persons or organisations.
What follows is, of course, pure fantasy BT IS IT?
The corridors of the EU buildings in Brussels and Strasbourg
are buzzing with the sound of secretaries pushing trolleys loaded with large boxes containing a secret
draft of an even more secret draft of an edict specifically aimed at those English trouble makers across the French
channel.
The drafts are being distributed to committees to be
read, absorbed, debated and amended then distributed to committees of a higher
authority. The subject of this 2000 page document is the humble shoe lace. For
far too long, in the view of the EU, shoe laces have had it all their own way
and created a confused and chaotic mess.
The EU, in its munificence, has now decided to end the turmoil and regularize the many
disparate variations on this theme. All members of the EU will, from an
undisclosed date, conform to certain rules regarding the design, manufacture,
distribution and wearing of shoe laces as prescribed in this document.
Shoe laces will, henceforth be of a determined length, shape, colour and durability as laid down in
this gobble de gook issued from the We Who Know Best dept. of the EU. More importantly shoe laces will
be political correct, bi sexual and not subject to race, creed or country of origin.
Shoe lace manufacturers wishing to deviate from the standard description
above may, without let or hindrance, submit a request to change, alter, invent, design, or in some strange manner stray from the rules as laid down by the Dept. That Knows Best. Forms for this request may be obtained by forwarding a hand written piece of lined note paper from any local EU We Know Best office on your high street. Tick boxes as
appropriate eg. Ethnic height, size of shoe left and right. Make four copies and send with a cheque for 100 Euros payable to the EU sports club to be received not later than 2094.
Governments, county and borough councils will be sent copies of this judgment in due course for distribution to the public along with several pages of tiny print which all are advised to read. Failure to do so may render recipients liable to a substantial fine or imprisonment where they will not be allowed shoelaces in case they try to hang themselves.
Don Read © don-read@tiscali.co.uk
www.youtube.com/donread
THE HYPOCRISY OF BUREAUCRACY
The EU spends £150m of tax payers
money a year on monthly migrating the assembly and all its trappings between
France and Belgium. Proposals for a fixed HQ
have been opposed by France. Imagine a monthly move of
Parliament from Londonto Doncaster and back.
