AUNTIE MACASSER 30.1/13 © Don Read
If Edward Lear could get away with- “The Owl And The Pussy Cat went to sea in a beautiful pea green boat etc “ then why can’t I get away with the following piece of nonsense ?
Antimacasser: A piece of cloth usually with a design. to
cover the top edge of a sofa to maintain cleanliness.
My auntie Macasser went to Mombasa
And came home with a beautiful Antimacassar
She told her sister Esther. who lived somewhere near Leicester
And kept an exceedingly tall prized aspidistra
Now Esther was such a skilled business investor
She told cousin Lester who lived up near Chester
That here was a business investment that just couldn’t fail
The three of them could open a shop selling tall aspidistras,
And antimacassars. folk could order by mail
After six months of trading their business was fading
It seems that the market just did not exist
Auntie Macasser went to live in Tadcaster
Cousin Esther eloped with a jester who’d tried to molester her
You may think it funny but shrewd cousin Lester made a shed loads of money
Whilst decked out in expensive, fash’nable tweeds
He refurbished rusty clapped out velocipedes*
*Velocipede: forerunner of the bicycle
Octageranium (sic) Don Read
If Edward Lear could get away with- “The Owl And The Pussy Cat went to sea in a beautiful pea green boat etc “ then why can’t I get away with the following piece of nonsense ?
Antimacasser: A piece of cloth usually with a design. to
cover the top edge of a sofa to maintain cleanliness.
My auntie Macasser went to Mombasa
And came home with a beautiful Antimacassar
She told her sister Esther. who lived somewhere near Leicester
And kept an exceedingly tall prized aspidistra
Now Esther was such a skilled business investor
She told cousin Lester who lived up near Chester
That here was a business investment that just couldn’t fail
The three of them could open a shop selling tall aspidistras,
And antimacassars. folk could order by mail
After six months of trading their business was fading
It seems that the market just did not exist
Auntie Macasser went to live in Tadcaster
Cousin Esther eloped with a jester who’d tried to molester her
You may think it funny but shrewd cousin Lester made a shed loads of money
Whilst decked out in expensive, fash’nable tweeds
He refurbished rusty clapped out velocipedes*
*Velocipede: forerunner of the bicycle
Octageranium (sic) Don Read
